July 2014 – stockHAL…m

Hi friends and family,

Apologies for letting nearly 6 months go by without writing! Stockholm is keeping me very busy bagging my own groceries, riding backwards on public transportation and having more conversations about the weather than I thought was humanly possible! This morning the sun woke me up around 4:00 am (I mean, full sunlight, guys) and even now as I type it is still a little light outside (11:00pm). So bizarre!

The future is also bright approaching my one-year anniversary in Stockholm. A month ago we finished the 2013-2014 school year and I am ecstatic to say that I will be continuing for 2014-2015. The school has offered me a permanent contract, which isn’t anything terribly different, but makes being an immigrant a bit more like a citizen–I’ve applied for a long-term VISA and will not need a new one every year; it helps make my job and life here more stable. For this I am so honored, grateful and relieved, all at once. Although it was a huge transition from conducting in Texas, the opportunity to collaborate with teachers and staff from 13 different countries and adapt lessons to teach entire classes of bi-, tri- and quadrilingual (spell check is telling me this is not a word, but, I’m telling you, these kids exist!) students was an enlightening experience. The importance of a global education has never been greater–thank you to all who have been so encouraging as I delve deeper.

Oh, this is funny. So, a few months ago at a choir rehearsal, our PR member told us she’d been contacted by “Rolling Stones management.” Something about singing a song with them when they came to Stockholm on tour. At the time, she wasn’t really sure if it was a scam or not, but promised to keep us posted on what developed. But you know what? I feel as though this deserves a post of its own, so…stay tuned. To be continued… (this is totally just a ploy to keep you interested in my blog…is it working?).

And now, it’s been a year. A year ago on July 31. Leaving the US with two suitcases and a head filled with what-ifs. People will tell you you’re brave. Well, over the last 363 days, I’ve been terrified, angry, I’ve cried, sobbed, doubted everything, been far away when bad things happen, wanted my parents, wanted my friends, wanted old childhood pets that have been gone for years, paid $10 for a beer (…every weekend), criticized, questioned, been homesick and heartbroken. That doesn’t make me brave. I’ve also learned, loved, discovered, expanded, compacted, absorbed, read and reread, taught and retaught, moved and moved again, sung, played, imbibed, eaten, cooked, danced and dreamed my way through it. No, that doesn’t make me brave, it just makes me stubborn as hell. Learning that life as this type of a person can be tough, lonely even at times, is a funny part of the mystery. Embrace it.

The reward is worth it. Your potential to contribute is worth it. There is beauty that only you can bring to this world, so be generous. It is worth it. That particular student’s “Oh, I get it!”; meeting new co-workers; making new friends; singing for the king and queen, The Rolling Stones, The Proms, that one person in the audience who really needed to hear it that day…it’s all worth it. (This entry is turning into a bad motivational speaker from L’Oreal). Of course you wouldn’t think that you’d be able to move halfway across the world and carve out a new existence if you didn’t just try. So, don’t ever give up, kids! (Sorry)…

So, Stockholm. Another year awaits us. Except this time? I’m a redhead 😉